Being a fiercely independent person, I take on almost all the home, minor vehicle, and equipment repairs with little thought about the responsibility. I had a recent trip to one of those big box hardware stores, needed to get a sparkplug to work on the weed eater and some materials to repair my porch from a recent break-in by an evil bandit, a raccoon that has managed some sizeable damage for such a tiny creature.
After working to remain polite about some man-splaning in the lawn care section and collecting my materials from lumber I was standing in the isle looking for the correct type of screws for the porch. I realized I was beginning to tear up. My initial thoughts, WTH, why was I starting to cry? For as long as I remember I would tuck my emotions away for reacting in any way was essentially equivalent to me giving ammunition to the enemy only to be used against me in the cruelest of ways. While I am sure it is not the healthiest of abilities, I have mastered controlling my emotions. I am learning to allow them out as I experience them which is as it should be. In that moment I was grateful for the ability to manage them, tucking it away, grabbing my screws and checking out.
As I loaded everything and climbed into the car I could contain it no longer. Why was I crying over screws. What was this sudden rush or emotions?
“Goodness is about character – integrity, honesty, kindness, generosity, moral courage, and the like. More than anything else, it is about how we treat other people.” -Dennis Prage