So it has been a difficult few weeks to say the least. I have tried to stay focused on my beliefs but find myself in a precarious position. I am empty and exhausted. I try to be supportive, to assist others when needed; I may have given so much I left nothing for myself. So what now? I have learned that life is not meant to be lived in isolation, we are not meant to navigate our journey detached and completely alone. Wednesday night I came to a realization that I have trouble even acknowledging; I needed someone to lean into to. I have never needed to be placed on a pedestal, I am very self-sufficient, able to meet my financial and physical needs per say but what about my emotional needs. Life had been difficult and I would have liked to known there was someone who was in my corner, someone who I could have depended on, someone I could have sat against on the couch in comfortable silence, someone to make me a cup of coffee and listen, a pair of arms to hug me for a moment of comfort, someone who would have made me laugh through my tears. I need to know I have a person. I will survive, I am strong enough to persevere but there is a lack in my life; maybe it will be forever unfilled.
“If you’re going to love someone or something then don’t be a slow leaking faucet—-be a hurricane.”
― Shannon L. Alder